Perfect Structure完美的ps结构

Introducing You 引人入胜的开头，不要陈词滥句
It is important to begin with a compelling introduction to arouse the interest of a weary Admissions Officer - who may have spent all night sifting through thousands of personal statements. Giving your personal statement a strong opening will engage the reader's attention from the outset. Common student mistakes include starting the personal statement with clichéd and overused sentences. For example, you should avoid starting your sentence with the following:
不要这样开头

'' I always wanted to study dentistry"
'' I want to study dentistry because….''
'' My passion has always been for dentistry''

Start your personal statement with an interesting event. Study the sample introductory paragraph below and the analysis of the introduction which follows it.用一个有趣的故事开头，学习以下段落的写法

"I am fascinated with dentistry because I love to network and build computers. If I spoke these words aloud, many people would scratch their heads and appear confused. At first glance, this statement appears absurd. On a closer look, however, it makes perfect sense.When I work on computers, I must operate within a tiny space inside a computer cache, taking extreme care to avoid damaging the delicate equipment. As a dentist, I will also perform my duties within the smallest of spaces, using tiny instruments on fragile surfaces."

This paragraph contains all the elements of a good introduction. It includes a gripping statement that compels the reader to keep going. Once you have established a good introduction, you are ready to write about your qualifications and experiences in your subject area. 开头能够让读者继续阅读下去

The Body 主体：每个段落应该有主题句，而且段落衔接紧凑
Your personal statement must proceed in a logical succession from one thought to the next. The body of the personal statement should lead in a convincing way from the introduction to conclusion. The paragraphing can be used as a planning tool. The beginning of each paragraph should introduce the topic and the paragraph must end in a 'hook' to the next paragraph.

Introductory paragraph

1. Whenever possible give the first sentence an interesting angle. 从一个有趣的角度开始

Body of the personal statement
Each paragraph should follow this general structure: 每个段落都应该符合以下的结构
Topic sentence about one of the ideas or categories mentioned in the introductory paragraph.
1. Specific detail (action that supports the point)
2. Specific detail (action that supports the point)
3. Specific detail (action that supports the point)

The Conclusion结尾：回扣主题
You should round off the personal statement with an attention grabbing sentence. You may find it helpful to reflect on your main accomplishments and experience. The main point of the conclusion is to underline your desire to study. Study the sample conclusion below.

"By combining these disciplines into a dual degree program, I can pursue my professional goal of doing education and military policy work for the government and perhaps teaching at university level. My experience as a Homeless Specialist has not only equipped me with an intellectual foundation for my future studies but has also supplied me with my career plans. After gaining knowledge of both psychology and political techniques at the highly regarded Manchester University, I plan to work for social services to use my knowledge of human behaviour to aid members of the public. My efforts paid off. At the end of the year, our team performed well and I ended up winning an 'Outstanding Student Award.' More important than the award, however, was the realisation that I had found my future career-in a courtroom. This time, however, the cases will be real."